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Chicks love assholes

The Dandy was home when I brought that latest piece of cougarbait over, btw. After the boy left, I lamented that I’d wanted to be into him but I just…wasn’t. The kid looked so great on paper. Why didn’t it work?

“He seemed kind of…bland,” The Dandy said. “I mean, does he even have any hobbies? Anything he’s passionate about?”

“Ooooh, that’s a good point,” I said. “He didn’t really have anything like that. All of his non-kink conversation was basically cat stories. And if I can just say, he wasn’t as interested in my art as I might have hoped. I make some cool shit, dammit. I want someone who’s excited about that!”

And I realized: I have a pattern of liking guys with a bit of an edge to them. Guys who are generally considerate and kind, but who will troll the shit out of people who deserve it. The key there, of course, is that we need to have the same idea of who deserves it. And the trolling has to be witty, not “you’re a big doodyhead!”

Recently, I was telling The Dandy about this guy on FetLife who had been consistently annoying me. He was a maledom with a lot to prove; he was so insecure that his username was a string of honourifics. Let’s call him MrReverendSir.

The Dandy said “Well, if he’s a reverend then doesn’t that mean the only ones he’s dominating are little boys?”

My jaw hit the floor. Then I started laughing. Then I wanted to fuck him. Oh, the meanness, it is delicious.

Another Dandy story: apparently in college he had a professor who would pretend not to hear one of his classmates’ questions, solely because the professor didn’t like this person.

So The Dandy started considerately “helping” the professor with his “hearing problem.” That one classmate would ask a question and professor would go “Yeah no I can’t hear you” and try to move on. And The Dandy would cheerfully bellow “HE SAID -” and repeat the question at the absolute top of his lungs, enunciating with precision. The Dandy has a big ol’ barrel chest. He can project his voice really fucking loudly. There is no possible way the professor could claim to have not heard him – so the professor had to answer the questions. 😀

The Pedant is also a catty bitch at people who have it coming. I can’t remember any specific zingers, but I know there have been some.

My favourite story about my ex-husband is that we were hanging out one time with his mom and one of her friends. The subject of veganism/vegetarianism came up somehow (ex and I were vegan at the time). His mom and her friend said animals are dumb so it’s no big deal if we eat them. Ex replied: “I guarantee you that the difference in intelligence between me and you two is at least as big as the difference between you and a cow. Does that mean I get to torture you to death?”

Ex was indeed a super-genius and his mom and her friends were…not, so I believe his statement was no exaggeration. But the audacity of calling someone stupid to their face! Especially your own mom! And what a brilliant way to make his point – make it personal. Ask her to take her “logic” to its inevitable conclusion. I loved it. In that moment I was thrilled to be his partner.

The 23yo I recently tried to date didn’t have that edge to him. And honestly he didn’t have the kind of quick-witted intelligence that turns my crank, either. So no wonder it was a bust.

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Adventures in cougaring

I would like to fall madly in love with someone new. I am increasingly realizing that this will necessitate the person being around my age, or at least like 35 (I’m 45). Even a really mature and awesome young person tends to lack…I dunno. Life experience or cynicism or something. I can’t seem to connect with them anymore on anything past a friend or FWB level.

Buttttt a 23yo local sub placed an ad in one of the FetLife classifieds groups and he really did seem amazing and I thought “hey, maybe let’s just see.”

Or, well. It was a bit more convoluted than that. His ad said that he was looking for someone around his own age and monogamous so I didn’t respond to his ad. I commented on a couple of his pics, though, in a friendly fashion. And apparently I piqued his interest despite being all old and poly n shit so he contacted me. I’m not terribly surprised. A lot of guys end up interested in me despite whatever dealbreakers I have. Hell, I was curious about him despite him being 23. People make exceptions for stuff.

We talked for a bit on FL and then met up in person. I remember mentioning to him at some point that I have a terrible tendency to fall for someone just based on them being compatible with me D/s-wise, when underneath it all our personalities didn’t mesh all that well. I think that’s what made things fizzle with Mine (aside from him continually cancelling on me for work). I said I want to be more careful about that in future. I then completely contradicted myself and ended up making out with him a bit and seeing him a second time even though the only spark to our conversations was coming from talking about kink. The thing is, we talked about kink almost constantly (mostly in the form of him barraging me with questions. Insightful questions about relationships and stuff, I should add. Not wank fodder questions). And when we talked about kinky stuff, there was an illusion of us getting along. If I’d forbidden kink-talk, though, our whole date would have been the most awkward of small talk. Pretty much just long silences interspersed with anecdotes about our cats.

I should probably have just been like “welp, you’re nice but I’m not really feeling it” on that first date. I think one reason I didn’t is that he actually lives in a neighbouring city and had to drive two hours each way for our date and I felt guilty about that. And also, like I said, there was somewhat of an illusion that we were getting along. And there were many things I liked about him.

I did tell him, near the end of that first meet, that I enjoyed hanging out with him but wasn’t sure I was feeling the kind of chemistry I’d want to. He said he wasn’t sure he was, either, and asked if there was enough something to be worth exploring further and see if something developed. I said yeah, I thought there was. And shortly after that he started giving me this super obvious “I want to kiss you” look – but didn’t act on it – and it totally woke up my predator instinct and I sat there grinning at him and not making a move until he went batshit with frustration and asked me to kiss him. I did.

We made out a bit and then he discovered how well I respond when he strokes my skin lightly. He petted my arms and neck until the public park we were sitting in faded away and I was just…floating. I haven’t had someone get so entranced by petting me since that lawyer I briefly dated a year or two ago. I miss that. I need that in my life.

I warned him not to go imprinting on me like a duckling or anything because I’m really pretty sure we’re not cut out for any huge relationship or anything. He said he still wants to find someone his own age for his forever-person – also someone who wants to have kids – but in the meantime he saw no reason to deny himself good experiences. We made out some more and then I said I should get going.

A few days later I invited him over to my place. Not – as I explained to him – because I was guaranteeing play or anything, but because hanging out here is free and there aren’t crowds of people around so it’s just more convenient all around. Secretly though I did figure I’d get naked and have him pet me some more, barring anything happening that wrecked the mood. I’m in such dire need of attention from someone who’s actually into it and not just being perfunctory.

It’s worth noting that in the interim between dates, I didn’t miss this kid at all. When I made our second date I didn’t look forward to it. It was just kind of a “let’s get this over with” thing. But, see, the first time or two that I met The Bunny (including when sexual stuff happened!) I wasn’t sure I was that into him, and I ended up being really attracted to him and into him after a while (though…not in love. Times I’ve fallen in love with someone, I think I felt the stomach butterflies pretty much immediately. So that’s something I need to take note of). Anyway, I wasn’t that attracted to this kid, but there was potential there, and we dovetail almost perfectly kink-wise, and dammit, he is smart and self-aware and articulate and those are all things that usually attract me. So I wanted to give it a shot.

To my surprise, when I came down to meet him and set eyes on him for the second time, he looked cute to me. Cuter than I’d remembered. Which seemed like a good sign. Our conversation was awkward AF, and we didn’t really start feeling somewhat comfortable until we started closing the awkward conversational gaps with snuggling and making out, which seemed like a bad sign. And he seemed to be doing the duckling-imprint thing that I had specifically told him not to do. I told him (by way of a bit don’t-get-too-close-to-me hint) that I know I’m not his forever-person but he’ll damn sure be awesome for someone. He said he may end up with someone else but until then, he wanted to be mine. Normally that kind of talk would turn me on, but the initial burst of “Oh, he’s cute!” had been seriously wavering so his big declaration of (temporary?) devotion just felt like an awkward talk waiting to happen.

I did eventually have him give me full-body pets, and also a foot rub, in hopes that it would spark something. He was excellent at both, and yet my previous tiny flutter of attraction kept fizzling out more and more. I didn’t wanna kick him out directly after having him do pleasurable stuff to me – it would have looked too much like I was using him, I think – but I did really want him out. I softened the departure by moving things from the bedroom to the living room: I made myself a snack (he wasn’t hungry) and we watched a bit of Netflix. As we sat there watching tv with him snuggled all up against me he said “So let me ask you this: how’s the chemistry now?”

He’d recently been running his hands all over my naked body and I was still wearing just a bathrobe and he was leaning his head on my shoulder and nuzzling up to me. I couldn’t bring myself to say “Yeah no it’s not working.” I just couldn’t. I stammered something like “Oh, so far so good…” and he asked if I’d like to see him again and I said probably.

Then I hustled him the fuck out of my apartment as fast as I could politely do so. He sent me a mushy text when he got home saying that he had a wonderful day and he hoped we’d have many more wonderful days together. I responded “sweet dreams!” (it was pretty late by then). In the morning – before he had a chance to send more mushy messages that would make it harder and harder to extricate myself – I texted him that I thought things weren’t working out for me, after all. That it’s nothing he did or anything, just a fluke of chemistry; I gave things a shot but they just didn’t quite click for me. I said that he’s amazing though and if he ever needs a character reference I’m happy to give one.

He took it well; didn’t lash out or anything, said he was disappointed but it happens. He mentioned, in his closing spiel, that he’d felt like he was starting to fall for me. That’s the thing about dating younger: they tend to fall quickly and easily. They also tend to think they’re on the same level as me in terms of maturity/intelligence/life experience, but they’re not. They just can’t see it from their vantage point. So there’s this big imbalance that they can’t comprehend.

It’s frustrating, though, that no matter how brutally honest I try to be, this shit happens. And not just with younger folks. I gave this kid my usual spiel, right upfront, that often I’ll be into someone for a short while and then suddenly I’m not. I told him the age gap would preclude me from having serious feelings for him so don’t get all wrapped up in me. And yet he did (at least when I bowed out he didn’t seem shocked or act like I did some mean bait-and-switch). I gave The Dandy that same spiel, back in the day, about my unfortunate pattern of abruptly losing interest. At the end of our first hookup he still said “so I assume we’ll be seeing each other again?” And sure, The Dandy ended up being one of the relationships that stuck, but that’s kind of a fluke; at the time I wasn’t all that attracted or into him yet.

I try to be so careful with potential partners. I tell them my wants, intentions, and downsides as bluntly as I can. I’m not sure why I bother. People believe what they want to believe.

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A nice night

The Dandy is officially the cook here (I hate cooking and am not good at it). He bows out of cooking dinner pretty often, though (I don’t think he realizes HOW often but whatever). Most of the time that it happens, I don’t see it coming – he just says “I have no interest in cooking today” and then he either orders us food or we both fend for ourselves.

Last night though he came home and said “time to space out for an hour and then start working again” (he’s a software developer and can work at the office or at home).

So it was a no-brainer to think that he wouldn’t want the burden of preparing food.

I came into his room and said as much and asked if he’d like me to pre-heat the oven for one of the instant-ish meals he has in the freezer. He said “Yes. Lasagna. …No, perogies. …No. I don’t know. I’m too burned out to decide.”

“You want lasagna,” I said, and went off to preheat the oven while I grilled up a trout fillet for myself.

I’ve been afraid of ovens all my life (shut up) but I’ve been somewhat getting over it since moving here. When the oven was good to go I realized there wasn’t really any reason not to put the lasagna in myself. The Dandy didn’t know I’d done this, and headed toward the kitchen a while later. I intercepted him and said “Lasagna time in about half an hour.”

“You’re cooking me dinner,” he said, happily. “It’s been a long time since you’ve done that.”

“It was really obvious that you’re having a rough day. I’ve got your back,” I said, hugging him.

While The Dandy ate his lasagna and I sat on the couch, I realized I was craving chocolate but we were all out.

“Y’know…” I said, “if you really wanna clear your head of work stuff for a bit, you could walk to the drug store for more chocolate. I’d keep you company and bring the dog so we get her walk out of the way.”

The Dandy considered this. “Your premise is sound,” he concluded.

After he ate I heard him fire up the shower. Showering is another thing he does to clear his head. It wasn’t clear to me if he’d decided against a chocolate run or was simply showering before going out, but I could afford to wait and see.

His showers take a thousand years. After that I heard the sound of his electric toothbrush (brushing his teeth is another clearing his head/getting a sense of control over his life thing).

At this point I was really dying for chocolate so I headed down the hall with the intent of asking what was up. Before I even reached him or spoke, The Dandy said “I’m up for a chocolate run. I just needed to take a shower because -”

“…to decompress. I know,” I said. I love that I know this about him.

On our way out to the store we saw a cool-looking display case someone had disposed of. We both determined that we wanted it. The Dandy said let’s still go to the store first and come back to assess the display case later. He said probably nobody would have taken it by then because the glass in one of the doors was shattered.

As we made our way to the shopping plaza, I said to The Dandy “I’m just spitballin’ here and I don’t guess this will interest you but I’m kinda thinking, if one pane of glass on the display case needs replacing anyway, it would be kinda cool to swap all of them out for coloured glass! Like with a violet tint to it or something. I realize this would somewhat defeat the purpose of a display case. But it would kinda work if someone was putting dishes in there or something – stuff that looked nice enough but wasn’t, like, ‘ooooooooooh!'” – I made a sweeping “ta-da” hand gesture to indicate very fancy things you want people to look at.

The Dandy chuckled at that.

We talked a bit more about what we might use the case for and where we would put it and – most importantly – how the fuck we would get it inside. The thing was huuuuge, probably six feet wide. It would hang over the edges of our dolly considerably no matter which way we put it on there. And the unspoken issue there is that I suck at lifting and maneuvering heavy things.

“Clearly,” I said, “I need to get myself another boyfriend and move him in with us, just so we’ll have some more muscle to help us with these furniture-moving projects.”

The Dandy paused and for a second I wondered if he felt I was suggesting he wasn’t enough for me or what. But then he said “I’d be okay with that, but only if he’s rich enough to make a penthouse a possibility.”

“Noted!” I said, grinning.

TBH I’m not sure I’d want to live with two partners. I remember how Dandette and I used to bond by mocking The Dandy and I feel like that sort of thing is kind of inevitable among metamours. I don’t have a SUPER thin skin but the thought of living with two people who know me reeeeeally well, including the bad stuff…I’d feel like I was really caught in the cross-hairs.

But it’s great to fantasize about the fun, sexy stuff, like the three of us living in one of our building’s huge luxury penthouses and me (in theory) being able to go into whoever’s room I wanted for snuggles and/or sex. So I like that The Dandy gave me license to dream.

Also – he may not have been kidding. He’s remarkably un-jealous and it seems feasible that he WOULD be okay in a live-in poly V, provided of course that he didn’t have to financially support the other guy.

Tragically, the drug store was closed due to some kind of emergency. And it was late enough that everything else nearby was closed. So that was a bust. I remembered I had chocolate syrup and gluten free waffles at home to tide me over though.

On the way home we took a closer look at the display case and it turns out it only LOOKED fancy – it was in fact made of particle board. We instantly agreed that we didn’t want it, after all.

On our way upstairs The Dandy decided that it was possible for him to set work aside for the rest of the night, after all. He said he was feeling too wrecked to be productive.

“Wanna hang out and watch something with me?” I asked.

He hesitated a bit too long and I figured this meant he didn’t but was too chicken to say so. So I jumped in with “…OR, if you really need to just space out with YouTube, can I have like ten minutes of snuggles first?”

He didn’t directly answer me but he did say that this is why we need to get a living room PC to hook up to the tv (an idea we’ve been bandying about) – because then he could watch YouTube in the living room and snuggle me AT THE SAME TIME.

“That would seriously solve SO MANY of my insomnia issues,” I said. “And that’s not a dig at the stuff you watch. You know I’ll also put on stuff of MINE to fall asleep to.”

We stripped down and snuggled on his bed and talked for a while about all kinds of things and I felt really close to him (I was hoping sex might materialize and it didn’t, but I know work fucks up his sex drive so I didn’t feel too anxious about it). And then he got up and sat in his computer chair and started using this scissor-jacknife thing to cut the dead skin off his feet and I decided to leave him to it and do other stuff and when I said “I need to get by you, could you just – ” he knew I was having a mild panic about the scissors and that I needed him to point the blades away from me while I squeezed past his chair and out the door.

I just…I love that we know each other so well. I love how easy it is to do nice things for each other that make the other person feel loved. I love The Dandy’s and my big plans for revamping the apartment, and how generous he is with making space in it for me.

Things feel good right now. 🙂

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Hee!

I forgot to mention – The Dandy is hoping to buy some fancy new stereo equipment soon, and to rearrange the living room to accommodate it.

The other day I was surprised by how much the sound from our tv carries – to get from the living room to our bedrooms you have to go around two corners and one of those internal walls is concrete but still The Dandy needed to close his door because my tv show was bugging him.

The Dandy said once he gets the speakers he wants, it’ll probably be even louder. I said I thought it would be good to take soundproofing measures, then, not just for tv noise but in case one of us has a guest in the living room while the other wants to chill out in bed. I said maybe we could buy some of that egg-carton-looking acoustic foam and cover most of the wall behind the tv/speakers.

The Dandy gave me a look. “I’m looking into buying a high-end sound system – ” he said, and I honestly thought he was about to make fun of me, like tell me that the point of it was to be heard everywhere or that acoustic foam wouldn’t work with such good speakers or I don’t know.

“…Yeah?” I said, a bit tentatively.

The Dandy finished his thought: “Supposedly, most women would be saying ‘noooo, it’ll cost too much!’ right now. Or  ‘It’ll be ugly! It’ll take up so much space!’ But with you it’s like ‘cool, let’s do major alterations to the room in order to accommodate it.”

I…feel like a bit of a traitor to feminism with how much it thrilled me to be deemed Not Like the Other Girls. I don’t even know if most women WOULD pooh-pooh the stereo system idea.

But let’s focus on this: The Dandy acknowledges that we are compatible and I make him happy.

For such a long time, when Dandette was here and terrorizing us and The Dandy treated her with kid gloves at my expense, I felt like he took me for granted. That he must not realize how good for him I really am or else he’d be fighting to preserve our relationship at all costs. I mean, I was giving serious thought to bailing and he knew it but he still didn’t take action to get Dandette out.

Now I think he was just really really scared of Dandette and that’s mostly why he didn’t do more. But also, he hadn’t fully realized yet just how awesome I am. Like I said before, Dandette was pure treachery; all passive aggression and hinting and seemingly nice acts that had a hidden agenda. And since that’s what The Dandy was used to, he assumed I was the same way.

Now he’s figured out that I’m strictly an at-face-value person; that when I’m good to him it doesn’t come with strings. And I think he’s realizing just how lucky he is.

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Just kinda floating along.

I was rereading some of my posts from just three months ago and boy, The Dandy was infuriating back then. Like I’d tell him clearly what I wanted but he just wouldn’t do it.

He’s mentioned a few times that everything Dandette ever said or did had some kind of weirdness or ulterior motive to it – that her words and body language almost never matched up. Indeed, I saw a good bit of that when she was living here. And I have had the epiphany that this may be why he was so annoying before – he hadn’t quite figured out yet that I don’t have schemes I’m running or tests I’m conducting.

I encouraged him, back in the day, to go to therapy so he could sort out all his Dandette baggage. He was in an abusive relationship with her for a long-ass time, to a point where I think he’d lost track of what a healthy relationship or boundaries are even supposed to look like. I figured he could use an impartial expert’s help on working his shit out. The Dandy is, unfortunately, one of these infuriating motherfuckers who thinks therapy is an admission of defeat or some shit, so he refused to go. He’s also not necessarily that open in talking about his feelings with me. But I’ve come to realize that he’s actually pretty wickedly emotionally intelligent so even if he never uses me as a sounding board, he’s probably figuring his shit out. Just kinda silently processing things and getting his head together.

And I think he must be making progress and that’s why things between us are pretty good. I actually asked him last night if he maybe used to have a hard time taking me at face value because he was used to Dandette and her manipulative ways, but perhaps he’s starting to realize that I’m not like that. He said yes.

He also doesn’t shut down on me whenever I have a relationship issue I need to discuss anymore. A while back I pointed this out and asked if he’d stopped immediately going into a “she’s gonna break up with me!” panic at the slightest issue. He says yeah, he feels more secure these days. I didn’t ask why – I guess to an extent I’m afraid if I poke into it too much I’ll jinx it. But it may well be because I’ve started making a point of telling him (like, a lot) that I want him to be my forever-person. He’ll snuggle up to me and pet my head as we’re going to sleep and I’ll sigh happily and say “I’m keeping you.” Things like that.

But the reason I’ve been saying those things lately is that I feel them lately because The Dandy has gotten so much better at giving me what I need. I really am feeling, lately, like our relationship has a good chance of lasting.

Funny how just a few tweaks to a relationship can completely transform it.

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Bleh.

The Dandy is at Dandette’s place dropping off some of her mail and stuff. I hate it.

It’s not that I’m particularly threatened by her or whatever; The Dandy didn’t want to be dating her even when he was dating her, and is well over his initial idea of maintaining a post-breakup friendship. It’s really just that him going over there reminds me that she exists, which in turn drums up all kinds of shitty feelings and memories.

Also he gives me updates on her life, which I am simultaneously curious about and deeply annoyed by. Since leaving The Dandy, Dandette has managed to get on disability (she’d applied before but got rejected because she lived here with Mr. Moneybags). She’s started going to the local sex club on a regular basis. And the latest buzz is that apparently she has a boyfriend and a girlfriend.

She’s a complete garbage-human and it feels like she’s getting rewarded for it with free money, sex parties, and now perhaps love as well. Although The Dandy pointed out that it’s her telling him she has a bf and a gf. They might just be people she’s fucking on a regular basis. Her ideas about things are often skewed.

Also the sex club thing repulses me because I fully remember how obvious and creepy Dandette’s exhibitionist kink was, and now I know she’s making an excuse to show even more people her putrid snatch. Albeit consenting people, since they all know they’re entering a naked place. But I never had any patience with the “tee hee, I’m naked and it’s so naughty” attitude of exhibitionists at the best of times, and in Dandette’s case that coy “oopsie, my tits are out!” type bullshit was actually emotionally scarring for me, so knowing that she’s going out of her way to be naked in public feels a bit like hearing that my rapist is still raping people, type thing.

Plus, the friends Dandette moved in with live way the fuck out in the boonies and I’d hoped it would be so far away that Dandette wouldn’t be bothered to make the trek out to civilization. I don’t want to run into her ever. The sex club she frequents is downtown, though*. SHE WALKS AMONG US.

On a whole other note, The Dandy has this bizarre blind spot where the dining room table is concerned. Ages ago, he himself made a pile of Dandette’s stuff on the table (I think there were plans for her to come pick stuff up and The Dandy wanted her bric-a-brac to be completely separate from mine so none of my shit disappeared, but then the plans fell through) and after a few weeks I said we oughta pack up the stuff of Dandette’s that was on the table and he said “what stuff?”

It happened again tonight before he left for Dandette’s; we’d finally gotten rid of the previous table-load, but I’d been putting other little things on the table as they surfaced; sunglasses, a tea cosy, a couple of handmade Christmas ornaments, etc. And again when I talked about packing her stuff up he said “what stuff?” O.o

I say The Dandy’s blind spot is about the table itself and not about Dandette or her stuff because there was another incident where a silver serving dish from Christmas was still sitting on the table  months later (washed) and when The Dandy was having a big Let’s Organize the Apartment phase I said we should do something about that fucking serving dish that’s on the table and he said “What serving dish?” and you guys WE WERE STANDING NEXT TO THE TABLE AT THE TIME.

To be clear, the table is not generally a storage spot for us. We eat at it regularly; the default, before it became a repository for Dandette’s stuff, was for it to be totally clear, give or take a dirty plate or two or a bottle of hot sauce. So I don’t know wtf is wrong with The Dandy.

 

*It’s also a place I’ve been to a few times and wouldn’t entirely have minded going to again. But I sure won’t do it now.

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It’s the little things…

Last night The Dandy was making a roast for dinner but then it seemed like that was gonna take too long so he declared that he would make sausages instead.

In the meantime, I fell asleep for a bit. Woke up to see The Dandy eating something. I hopefully said “sausages?” and he said nah, he didn’t know how long i’d be asleep so he just heated up some leftovers for himself.

Then he said the roast seemed about done anyway if I wanted that. I said I’d been craving sausages ever since he mentioned them but meh, if there’s meat already done, fair enough.

The Dandy asked me, with no trace of impatience or resentment, what I’d most like to eat right then. I said sausages. He grilled me some sausages. 🙂

Later, when I was taking the dog out, he came with me in order to keep me company and also take out some garbage and recycling (I don’t like trying to walk the idiot dog and juggle bags of refuse at the same time).

When we got out to the building’s little dog park I realized the little pouch on the leash was empty – I’d used the last poo bag in the roll the night before and forgotten to replace it.

“Should I get more?” The Dandy asked. I said yes please. So he went all the way back up to the 25th floor and got me a new roll. Also by that point the dog had shat twice and I’d lost track of where so he helped me look.

I must confess, in both cases I could have settled; eaten the beef, been a bad citizen and not picked up the poop (NB: I often pick up other dogs’ abandoned poops so my poo karma would still be intact overall). But The Dandy offered to inconvenience himself for me and I love it when a guy does that so I said yes.

Yes, give me the thing I really want. Sacrifice yourself to make me happy.

I think our relationship works partly because even though we’re egalitarian, he still pushes my dom-buttons sometimes. I’d imagine I push his sometimes, too.

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