The Dandy and I had sex last night. I was craving doggie-style-with-vibrator, and he seemed happy enough to oblige. I was just getting into a good groove when The Dandy started breathing audibly (which is what he does when he comes. Dude is so silent and nonreactive when stimulated that his breathing doesn’t change until the very end). I hoped that maybe I was wrong and he was just getting close. And indeed, he paused a minute and began thrusting again. But almost immediately he was like “Yeah no I can’t keep going. I came.” (Sometimes he can keep going after an orgasm, so it’s not absurd that he tried.)
That’s not the first time he’s come really quickly while I was using my vibrator during sex. It made me wonder: did he think the intercourse was all for him, even though I was clearly trying to get off? What even happened there? Just seems rude to me.
I cautiously broached the subject as he de-condomed and wiped himself off: “Y’know, generally when I haul out the Hitachi during sex it means I’m hoping you’ll last until I’m done.”
“I know,” The Dandy said. “That was my intention. But it’s been a while since we’ve done it, so…”
“So I felt so good inside that you couldn’t help yourself?” I prompted.
“No, say the words. Fast ejaculation because I turn someone on so much is a huge kink of mine.”
The Dandy set his soiled Kleenexes aside, got back in bed beside me, and gathered me up in his arms so he was spooning me. “Well, we hadn’t had sex in a while, and it felt really good. And I tried to make it last, but…” he said, awkwardly. I loved that he said those things for me even though it was difficult for him.
“Thank you,” I said. “I will be fapping to that for possibly the rest of my life.”
I also asked him whether coming quickly like that was a function of not having had sex for a while at all, or with a particular person. Are Dandette and I on two different “tracks” in his head? Would he come quickly from not having fucked me in a while, even if he’d recently been with her? The Dandy said he wasn’t sure (and I guess that means he and Dandette haven’t had sex in a while, although I honestly hadn’t been digging for that info). He said all he knew was that masturbation doesn’t affect it.
Sometime that same night – I can’t remember anymore if it was before or after the sex – we were cuddling in bed and I asked “Hey do you ever pretend I’m someone else during sex? Except if you do, don’t tell me who because that’s too much.” (There’s a line between curiosity and insecurity and in this particular case, who he might picture was exactly that line.)
The Dandy chuckled – I think at the codicil I’d added to my question – and said “Do I pretend you’re someone else? No. I may use memories of encounters with other people to kind of fuel things, though.”
“Me too!” I said. “Don’t tell me specifically who or what you think of. But yeah, I might, um, draw inspiration from other stuff sometimes, as well. But I always know that you’re the one I’m actually with.”
And we smiled at each other, pleased to realize we’re on the same page. And I felt closer to him.