On a side note

I’ve known The Dandy for maybe seven years or something but never heard his (unusual) last name pronounced until Dandette said it a few months ago. It’s pronounced differently from how I’d assumed, and I’d been saying it the wrong way in my head for so damn long that it’s like I have to reprogram my brain completely now if I ever wanna get it right.

So that’s funny.

Oh, and another tangent: I wasn’t too keen on The Dandy’s body when we were first dating, aesthetically speaking (except his cock which is spectacular), but I’m used to it now. That body is the carrying case for a brain I particularly like, and it’s warm and it’s familiar, so I’m fond of it. Sometimes I even find it physically attractive. I wonder if I’m too quick to dismiss guys who seem neat-o but their looks don’t really do it for me? I wonder if I could be attracted to any guy I liked, eventually, as long as he had one or two features I enjoyed, or if it only happens sometimes for whatever reason?

Related: I think a big component of attraction for me is that a guy has a face that looks good to me close up. Which seems to require a wide/fat face, since close up I go a bit cross-eyed and it kinda compresses the other person’s features. Men with skinny faces end up looking like stick insects to me. The Dandy has kind of a big face (in keeping with his general overweightness, I guess) and really pretty eyes and when we lie in bed together I stare into his face from four inches away and he is the prettiest goddamned boy in the whole world. So pretty it makes me catch my breath. So pretty I can actually feel my pupils dilate when I look at him, to the point where my eyes hurt. And actually I think this eye contact thing is kinda new; I seem to recall The Dandy becoming uncomfortable and deflecting, before, when I would try to gaze into his eyes like that. Now he seems to revel in it.

Things are not happening in the order I would have preferred, but now – finally – after dating him for months and moving in with him, I think I’m kinda falling in love with this boy.

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