The other night The Dandy and I had sorta decided we were gonna have sex but we weren’t hurrying toward it, just talking and goofing around. I asked him to beg me to torture his cock and balls – not that I’d do it, since I know he’s not into it, but I wanted the titillation of hearing him ask. He wouldn’t, though. He’s said and done other things just to please me but I guess this was the line.
I’m up for a certain amount of acting in order to turn him on, though, so I asked what incongruous-for-me thing he’d like to hear me say that would arouse him. He said he guessed an incongruous-but-hot thing for me to say would be “boss me around.”
“I have said that,” I said. “Maybe not in those exact words, but I’ve asked you a few times to tell me what you’d like me to do.” I think I’d asked him just that morning, actually…I mean the thing is, The Dandy doesn’t seem to have a lot of turn-ons and I’m a person who wants to really “wow” my partners in bed. So if a partner is kind of opaque in his reactions (as The Dandy often is) I’ll be like “Tell me what you want right now” in hopes that he’ll guide me to the specific things he craves and I’ll do them and that way I know I’m being good in bed, with him, at that moment.
Our conversation wandered off to other topics and then I ended up kissing/licking/sucking his cock (it’s really pretty and has great mouthfeel, and The Dandy is naked around the house a lot, so I get distracted that way a fair bit). After a few minutes I looked up at him, grinned, and said “boss me around.”
The Dandy hesitated.
“Tell me what to do,” I encouraged. “…Uh, just make sure it’s stuff I actually can do. Don’t tell me to deep throat you or anything.”
After another brief pause, The Dandy said “Well, I guess for starters I never told you you could stop sucking my cock.”
Ooooh, fun! After so many conversations where I tried to pry out of him what he wanted as a dominant (so I could attempt to give him some of it, although I’m not sure he realized that’s why I asked) he was finally opening up a bit. I made big eyes at him and softly said “I’m sorry, sir” (and his cock twitched in my hand) and went back to sucking and licking him. He reached down and petted my hair. After a while I looked up at him with the same big eyes and asked “Am I a good girl?” He said that I was and I said “Thank you, sir” (and his cock twitched again. Hee! Dance, puppet, dance!) and went back to it.
The Dandy gave me no further instructions and my jaw started to get tired so eventually I disengaged and asked “permission to board?” while shifting my gaze pointedly between his face and his cock. He said yes and I got out the condoms and lube and from there our sex proceeded like it normally does.
Afterward, I asked if he’d liked telling me what to do. “It was…kind of disconcerting,” The Dandy said, “but yeah, I did like it.”
I laughed because I totally know what he means about it being disconcerting. That morning when we had sex (I’ve been a huuuuge horndog lately and Dandette’s been gone so I’m just on him all the time), I was on top and at one point The Dandy laced his fingers with mine and pulled me forward so I ended up basically pinning his arms to the mattress. Which…should have been hot? He’s got such gorgeous blue eyes and they look even bigger when he gazes up at me, which he was doing. But I know he’s dominant so it’s like…is he doing this in a conscious attempt to turn me on? Does he just not realize that his current position might come across as bottomy to me? How much am I allowed to enjoy this? If I enjoy it too much or make too big a thing of it will it kill his boner? Etc.
I’m blanking on what exactly I said to The Dandy here. I definitely said I’m willing to play that way sometimes – with him telling me what to do and stuff. I may have added a codicil that he not act too stereotypically domly-dom. I definitely brought up the fact that I will sometimes enjoy him in a dominant sorta way inside my head and I’m pretty sure he knows it but I deliberately refrain from acting really toppy like with trash talk n shit because I figure that would be a boner-killer for him. He agreed that it would be. I think we’re both on the same page here of being willing to give the other person some fantasy fuel as long as they use it responsibly. 😀