Oh for pete’s sake.

Okay but hold on.

I Googled women taking Viagara and amazingly enough the first few articles confirm exactly what I thought: that Viagara can be beneficial to some women. I expected to only see articles saying “Oh, but when women have sexual problems it’s because they have hangups and just need to relax! Viagara can’t help with that!” but no, a couple of (female, btw) scientists did a study about this and Viagara helped when women had desire but couldn’t get it up.

But the issue the Viagara was treating isn’t given the straightforward descriptive name of “erectile dysfunction” – apparently it’s known as Female Sexual Arousal Disorder, because man things and lady-things always have to have special, different names even if they are the exact same motherfucking thing.*

Okay so now I’m Googling “FSAD,” the acronym for the super-special pinkwashed term for ladies to use about their lady-parts not getting erections, and there’s some information, finally. We’ll see if any of it is useful.


*I still remember referring to one of my dad’s button-down shirts as a “blouse” when I was a kid and my mom correcting me. His shirt was a shirt. Her shirt which looked just the same except the buttons were on the opposite side was a blouse. This was deeply confusing to me. And a few years back a guy I was seeing teased me for calling it a “hand job” when a guy used his hand to give me an orgasm. He said it’s weird to call it that unless it’s a guy on the receiving end. When it’s a woman it’s “fingering.” Um, okay. The word “fingering” has always seemed very vague to me. First off it sounds like a thing you just idly do for no real reason, not a deliberate way to give someone an orgasm. Secondly I’ve heard people use it to mean clitoral stuff or fingerbanging so what even is it?


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6 responses to “Oh for pete’s sake.

  1. Leah

    I use handjob to describe men and women, same as giving or getting head. In my experience, “fingering” is used by many as a catch-all, but to ME it has specific connotations of going inside the vagina, which will NOT bring me to orgasm.

    AND… god, just knowing they have to have completely separate terms (and my thought is that men AND women struggle with the idea that a clit is basically a small penis so they HAVE to be different) makes me even more infuriated. Thank god for my bubble where none of this shit matters to my people and we can tell it like it is.

    • Yes, exactly, I’m assuming they had a different term for women’s erectile issues because a lot of people would be grossed out by the idea that penises and clitorises are kinda the same.


  2. Moz Downunder

    Now don’t you go bothering your delicate lady-brain with these things, just do what the nice man tells you. If he wants to call it finger-banging, then it’s finger-banging. Very active and masculine activity, finger-banging. A man giving a hand-job sounds, well, gay. Can’t have that.

    Also, fingering is what string musicians practice (I kid you not). Think of all the little Suzuki violin school kids doing fingering… and let’s not call the sex act that, shall we? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fingering_(music)

    F-SAD sounds retronymic – they made the acronym to sound that way. Someone went sex no good… something… sexual arousal disorder, ohhh, SAD. “woman is sad”.. hmm… uh, Oh! “Female-Sad”, yeah, that’s it!

  3. Orange Joe

    Personally I love the word “ladyboner”. 🙂

  4. Brian

    So there you go – ammo for the docs to see about ED med samples!

  5. Mark T. Gibson

    In the Army & Marines, we called our shirts “blouses”. The Marines call a necktie a “field scarf”.

    It’s my contention that men who have absolutely no care in the world if other people think they’re manly (because the truth is so self-evidently obvious) just don’t give a damn about the gender-consciousness of words. They have more important things to worry about.

    I’m long past my salad days, but I still feel the same way when I wear my chastity device at a CFNM, Dungeon, or any other public play event. I literally don’t care what anyone else thinks about how “manly” I am & can’t imagine how it could possibly concern me. I have scars from two wars. Fine…I wear a blouse.

    (& panties, but that’s a whole ‘nother post!)

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