Well fuck.

New Boy broke things off with me, citing that he needs to focus on his career. Yes, he did this just days after telling me that he prioritizes love/relationships above all else.

I’m bummed, but can’t really bring myself to care that much. If he’d done this the day after I saw him last, I’d be devastated, but the fact of the matter is I need pretty frequent contact with someone in order to maintain my feelings for them and with this boy I’m at a point where I can’t even remember him clearly.

I wonder if his”I need to buckle down and focus on work” thing is just a front and really he’s just gone off me, or is doing one of those “I’m about to get a thing I want and it scares me so it’s time to run away” things? I guess I’ll never know. Or I’ll stalk his Fetlife profile a week from now and see that he’s posted a dozen more personal ads or entered a relationship wih someone else.

Well, whatever.

In other news, I’m sending the cats to stay with The Dandy until I can secure a new apartment. The harpy downstairs has been losing her shit every time she hears Dickface the Kitten running around and it’s stressing me out to a point where I’ve been crating her for 12 hrs a day and having a panic attack every time she jumps down from the couch or looks like she might want to play. I can’t live like this.

So the cats are going to a place where they can live normally and I’ll be able to stay here and prepare to move out with hopefully less anxiety etc.

I was originally not going to give notice here until I found a place but I think I will in fact give notice and if I can’t find a place in time, I’ll couch-surf. I can’t be here anymore.

The Dandy has agreed to act as a guarantor for me (if the place I just applied to rejects me) so hopefully that will get me into a new place faster. If it doesn’t I don’t know what on earth I’ll do.

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