Things that hit my “no”-button

In my previous post I said I’ve become super bitter and angry and will dismiss a guy I was potentially interested in at the slightest offense. Just for fun, here’s what it’s like to be inside my head as I browse Fetlife profiles of guys who initially seemed okay (and who I might have given a chance at one time).

One or more of his profile pics depicts the stereotype of a dominant woman (thin, white, long hair, high heels and a whip, blah blah blah): NOPE. NEXT!

His fetish list has anything about wanting to see a woman in lingerie or heels: NO. FUCK OFF.

His fetish list is mostly (or all) sex acts: UGH NO.

“I want to serve a dominant woman” without specifying how (spoilers: these are always the guys whose fetish lists are mostly sex acts): GTFO.

“I want to serve a dominant woman…by letting her ‘use’ me sexually”: PLZ LEARN WHAT “SERVICE” IS AND THEN JUMP UP YOUR OWN ASS AND DIE.

“I’m looking for a beautiful dominant woman to -” NO FUCK OFF.

Calling women “females”: DIE IN A FIRE YOU FUCKING FERENGI.

Saying anything about women being superior: NOPE NOPE NOPE.

Saying that he needs a dominant woman or needs someone to fulfill his fetishes: ALL ABOARD THE EXPRESS TRAIN TO FUCKOFFVILLE.

Beseeching women to “teach” him or “help” him: RANDOM WOMEN ARE NOT YOUR MOMMY. OFFER SOMETHING IN RETURN OR STFU.

Using the word “subby”: NO.

Using the word “mistress”: UGH NO.

Using the word “dominatrix”: UGGGGH JUST SHUT UP AND GO BACK TO WATCHING YOUR PORN ALREADY.

Being titillated by how dirty and naughty his kinks are: NOOOOOOOPE.

Foot fetishist: MEH.

Obsessed with giving oral: HARD PASS.

“I won’t go to kink events/the fact that I’m kinky has to be sooooper sekrit” – NOOOOPE.

“I’m actually submissive but I list myself as a switch because women seem to only want dominant men”: WHY WOULD I WANT TO BE WITH SOMEONE WHO CLEARLY PRIORITIZES GETTING HIS DICK WET AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE OVER HAVING A FULFILLING INTERACTION WITH SOMEONE?

Like I said, I might have tried to look past these things at one point. “Oh, he’s probably well-meaning but just doesn’t realize the connotations of that word.” “He’s clearly a bit conflicted about submission but maybe positive re-enforcement will get rid of that” “Okay, most guys with a fetish for feet or oral refuse to follow instructions and just wanna touch me whatever way turns them on, but maybe this guy will be different!” “Okay, most guys who say they wanna ‘serve’ a woman actually just mean ‘I want to lie there passively while you do things to my dick'” but maybe this guy will be different!” But right now I do not have the patience. I just don’t. Fuck it.

 

 

7 Comments

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7 responses to “Things that hit my “no”-button

  1. Reblogged this on dave94015 and commented:
    Guys, if you’re trying to navigate through the minefield of online dating here are some major turn-offs from this blogger

  2. It’s tough enough for a guy to try and reach out to someone else without making a mistake he isn’t aware of…but you post lays out the list of turn-offs at least!

  3. mstabbity

    Beseeching women to “teach” him or “help” him: RANDOM WOMEN ARE NOT YOUR MOMMY. OFFER SOMETHING IN RETURN OR STFU.

    Ahahaha yes! You want to learn? There’s only an entire fucking internet full of information waiting for you to get off your ass and google it.

    • I’ve seen personal ads from newbie female subs looking for men to “teach” them but those ads always said “in return you’ll get my loyalty and obedience” or similar. Dude-subs always come off to me as just wanting a woman to do stuff to them so they gain experience, and they aren’t in any way thinking about what a woman might get out of that or how to make it seem appealing to women. It’s a huge pet peeve.

  4. I think especially in the realm of online dating, it makes A LOT of sense to be extremely picky. Dating is not a hiring process — you don’t owe people ” a fair shot.” There’s eight bajillion dating profiles available, if you don’t put fairly high bars in place, you will have way too many people to filter through.

  5. Susi

    I’m a switcher who recently discovered her dominant nature and started experimenting with it. I thought that something was wrong with me cause all these “getting things done to his dick”-ideas of male subs kept irritating me. Yeah, I know I’m young, but quite a fast learner… Thanks for this list of red flags, you have a new follower 🙂

    Greetings from Austria, Susi

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