You may remember that the last time I saw The Pedant I told him that I was feeling like “filler” in between his club and concert outings and I wanted to feel like more of a priority – I wanted him to initiate time with me, to see me. Not with an undertone of “I’m gonna come over and there’s also this thing I wanna go to and if you’re not into it I’ll just go myself and come back to your apartment afterward” Or “I’d like to come over on Saturday…to crash after the concert I’m attending.” I don’t mind that shit sometimes but it had just happened twice in a row and I’m feeling neglected in general so I really want him to focus on me for a change.
The other day he texted me asking if I wanted to go to some particular goth night at a club this Friday. It’s not one I was familiar with, so he sent me a link to the event page on Facebook. And I saw that he’d clicked there that he was going. Not a maybe. A yes.
I know people RSVP to events on Facebook all the time and don’t end up going, but I’m pretty sure The Pedant is in fact definitely going to this thing and I’m an adjunct to his nightlife activities. Again. Dammit.
I did ask him if he was working that day during the day – just kinda sussing out whether he was planning to visit me or if he was only inviting me out clubbing – and he said yes, he is working, until 4pm. Then he asked me if I’m working and I said no and he didn’t go on to invite himself over after his shift so I don’t know why the fuck he even asked me my schedule. Y’know, he claims to be obtuse about conversational conventions, deaf to hints, etc., but he doesn’t seem that terrible at it to me and I do think he knows that when someone is asking if you’re free it means they’d like to see you. But who the hell knows.
The club night was iffy for me, anyway – the music sounds like it’s not to my taste and there’s an expensive cover that The Pedant would probably pay but he didn’t specifically say so I don’t want to assume. And Mine is coming over the next day so I don’t want to be out all night and be too fuzzy-brained to be good company.
I just texted The Pedant that I’m gonna pass on the club night but thanks anyway. It would be nice – vindicating, even – if he responded along the lines of “Want me to just come over that evening instead?” but I’m not holding my breath.
By the way I haven’t heard much from him since those two random chatty phone calls mentioned in a previous post. So I dunno. Maybe the calls were coincidence and he’s not consciously trying to get our relationship back on track, after all.
Edit/update: he responded to my “I won’t be coming out clubbing” with “no problem. :)” And some chitchat about how I’m doing. But nothing about wanting to see me. Alrighty then.