I have somehow gotten onto an obsessive, nonsensical, exhaustion-fueled Facebook-stalkathon of people I knew in high school.
A lot of them are Facebook friends with their entire high school clique and still living in the small town where we grew up, which makes me feel claustrophobic.
And yet those who had longish-term partners back then most of the time don’t have that ex-partner friended. I can sort of understand this for the relationships that seemed fucked up and unhealthy, but it’s true even of the people who seemed to genuinely have good relationships (as far as I could tell).
Most of them aren’t making their relationship info public (or maybe they’re just single).
And yet most of them also prominently display photos of children – sometimes to the exclusion of photos of themselves. So they don’t mind people knowing that they have kids, and yet there’s “No relationship info to show.” Are they all divorced? What’s up with that?
It’s fascinating how totally the same some people look compared to high school and how totally different others do. And when I say “different” I don’t mean fat or wrinkled (necessarily). I mean that age seems to have changed their whole facial structure somehow and I only see a shadow of the person I used to know.
The ex who was my hot little trophy back in the day is now a paunchy, balding suburbanite with a wife and two kids and it is so hard to get my head around that. Especially because I am not in a suburban or child-having place, and never have been. But also because for a while I was certain that this particular ex was gay.
I wonder how many of the people I looked up would even remember me? These mostly aren’t friends I’m investigating, per se. Merely acquaintances. And I was a quiet loner in high school who probably didn’t make much of an impression.