*gulp*

The Pedant gave me his address without asking what I wanted it for. I know he was curious though because he joked around about me sending him a bomb or something, probably by way of giving me an opening to say “No, it’s not a bomb, it’s…” But I’m not telling. 😀

Here is what I wrote to him, in case this backfires on me somehow and I want to overanalyze what I said later and make myself insane. 😛 I’m not publishing this post until AFTER I’VE MAILED THE LETTER because I don’t want anyone saying shit that makes me too nervous to send it. It’s a done deal now, you guys. It’s out there.

*Ahem*.

Pedant:

For a long time I’ve felt it’s a shame people rarely write physical letters anymore. It’s nice to receive a token of someone’s esteem that you can actually touch. And when you got excited at the prospect of having a pen pal, I realized you felt the same way.

So this is me, attempting to revive the age-old art of the love letter. Because I think you’d like it. Because I’m a naturally effusive person. Because, believe it or not, there are t things I’ve been too frightened to say to you in person (for fear of rejection, I guess. No, fear of awkwardness. I know you don’t know how to react to me, sometimes…now you can feel whatever you feel without an audience).

I adore your brain that so adeptly assimilates and categorizes information. For me, most days, life can feel like slogging through quicksand. Through your eyes the world looks like a safer, more ordered place where there is reason and structure and linearity. You are a calming influence on me. The thing in you that you’ve described as a lack of empathy usually just seems to me like a soothing counterpoint to my own problematic superpower of being able to feel my own feelings and EVERYONE ELSE’S ALL THE TIME. And you’re a lot better at reading people than you seem to think.

I adore your body. Every inch of you is miraculous to me. Miraculous the way your bones hold up your flesh holds up your skin, and all of it so pretty. Miraculous the pheromonal alchemy that makes you smell and taste like home to me. You have perhaps the most elegant hands I’ve ever seen, and I want them on me all the time. I could write a book of haiku dedicated solely to that curve where your ass meets your lower back, AND MAYBE I WILL. Having all of your momentous pretty collared and at my disposal makes me weak in the knees.

I adore that you seem to understand and accept me as I am yet support me in becoming the best possible version of myself. I will strive to be a place of acceptance and support for you, too, every single day. You deserve to be loved for exactly who you are.

[Doodle of heart with arrow through it] Cowgirl

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2 responses to “*gulp*

  1. Pingback: Hmmm. | hiding in plain sight

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