I’m not sure I’ll leave this up for long. We’ll see. But I’ve noticed that most men have no idea what weight looks like on a woman, and have insane numerical standards for what they consider “fat” or “thin.”
For that matter I myself am baffled by my body and its weight right now.
So here I am, trying to be what the kids call a “teachable moment” – or maybe just ranting.
Years and years ago, my then-husband and his friend and I were watching a women’s tennis match on tv. They showed the stats of the players. One of them was six feet tall and 160lbs. Husband’s friend was like “Holy shit, ONE-SIXTY?! That’s a lot!” which is weird because the woman was right there on the screen and she was in totally kickass shape – clearly not fat. I guess friend just had no idea that a thin woman could possibly weigh that much? Anyway, husband for some fucking reason decided to call out, “Cowgirl weighs 160, too!” This was a true statement, and I wasn’t usually one to be all coy about my weight (or age or any other common womanly sensitive spot) but I didn’t love how friend turned and gawked at me in horror/amazement at this revelation. Why husband felt the need to blurt that out, at that moment, is beyond me.
Anyway. Now I am just over 200lbs, which even at six feet tall sounds…kinda fat to me, for a chick. I’m in reasonably good shape, muscle-wise, but nowhere near how that tennis player was, I don’t think…and I’m carrying forty pounds of fat on top of whatever muscle I have.
And yet I have a 32″ waist and you can even still see my mighty sixpack. See?
And this is why, when I see some dude’s personal ad that’s like “I don’t want any fat chicks! Must be 120lbs or less!” it makes me roll my eyes.
…Well, first I think “you’re not factoring for height, dumbfuck, not every chick is 5’2″” and then I roll my eyes. Could you even imagine me weighing 120? That’s EIGHTY POUNDS less than what you see here. I’d be dead.
To be clear, if a guy wants someone who’s built really narrow and skinny, I don’t care. People are allowed to have preferences and skinny women are as worthy of desire as anyone else. But these guys I’m talking about? They don’t say they prefer someone with a very, very slight body type. They overwhelmingly just say that they want someone not-fat – and specify that this means 120 or 130lbs without specifying a height range or body type or any other detail at all. Not-fat is all they appear to care about.
Well, dumbasses, here I am, at 200lbs, being all not-fat n shit. Look how not-fat I am! And back when I was at my fittest and skinniest, when strangers would ask me on an almost daily basis if I was a model, I was still well above your stated weight limit. This is what you missed out on in your short-sightedness. Have fun shopping for partners in the tiny, tiny dating pool you’ve made for yourself.