GODFUCKINGDAMMIT.

Paypet gets paid today and we had plans for me to spend some of it tonight. But things are…not going as they were supposed to, I think? Or maybe I misunderstood our exact plans, but I get a bad feeling about this. The bottom line is I’m sitting here not online shopping because pet didn’t put money in his account yet, and I’m very much wondering if all his talk about his money now being my money was just wank-talk that he is now regretting.

He says lots of things that he openly admits are just wacky daydreams – we’ve spitballed about him becoming my live-in pet and all sorts of shit. It was stupid of me not to realize that all the grandiose money talk may have been the exact same thing. I think I was categorizing it differently because he’s actually in a position to give me money, and has (just not the crazy-ass amounts he’s talked about). Whereas he lives in Florida and I live in Canada so living together is obviously nowhere near happening.

I’m perfectly willing to walk away from this if need be – I refuse to let his promises of money control me – but I hate that he got me daydreaming about a life not totally pinched by poverty.

2 Comments

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2 responses to “GODFUCKINGDAMMIT.

  1. trillian

    So maybe he gets a kick not from spending money on you but _talking about it_.

    • Everything worked out okay! I literally JUST hit “publish” on a new post talking about it.

      But yeah, I wondered if he was mostly talk, too. There are definitely a lot of timewasters like that out there.

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