OMGWTF FEMME?!?!?

After pretty much a lifetime of building my identity around being low-maintenance and semi-butch, I am suddenly getting huuuuuge into nail polish.  And also feeling super interested in accumulating a bunch of makeup.

On one hand, it’s fun to play around with my image and make myself into a living work of art.  On the other hand, this is all playing hell with my internalized misogyny.  

So far, the fun side is winning.  But I have tentative plans to get foot fetishists to buy nail polish for me in exchange for photos, since I can’t afford to be buying extraneous shiny things right now.

 

11 Comments

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11 responses to “OMGWTF FEMME?!?!?

  1. trillian

    I totally understand. I have 30+ little varnishes and even worse, more than 50 lipsticks. 5 different (friggin’ expensive) foundations, 3 blushes, 2 eye concealers. Thank goodness I don’t do eye make up because I’d be bankrupt. Make up is just the funnest fun ever! And you can look different every day which men just love – varietas delectat 🙂

    • OMG so much has happened in the world of nail polish since the last time I really bothered looking! There are textured ones and holographic ones and crackle ones and magnetic ones. Want want want!

  2. Thud

    Nailpolish is as versatile as ductape in the fix-t-yerself domain !

  3. Thud

    Not that I can be choose-y, but I prefer low-maintenance lovers. They are ready to do thinks at the drop of a hat (or should I be saying “at the drop of panties”?) without worrying what they look like or worrying about getting their hair mussed. In fact I had only one lover who always showered before returning home (to her DH & family). The others exercised varying degrees of selfmaintenance but in general came to me clean (if not shaved) nicely attired and certainly presentable (not really necessary if we were going to be in a motelroom midday with the drapes drawn tight-closed)

  4. Argentum

    I think you can totally pull off BOTH ‘low-maintenance’ and ‘has fun looking awesome all dolled up’. There’s nothing misogynistic (imho) about liking pretty nails or admiring yourself with mascara. The problem is only when you start to feel insecure and ashamed to go out in public without perfect nails and makeup, or without cleanly shaven legs – though pretty much all the women I know would be too embarrassed to be seen in public with hair on their legs. Don’t let your self-worth rely on a certain physical image, whether that is butch or femme. (Sorry if that comment sounds hugely insensitive to people who proudly link their identities to a certain physical appearance. I do recognize how easy it is for me to say it, since I am comfortable in the body I was born with.)

    • It’s not that I think it’s misogynist to like makeup per se, it’s that society portrays girly things as stupid and frivolous. So if I got a sudden interest in, say, going to football games, I suppose I’d probably rationalize that as fine. But on some level it feels like an interest in makeup is silly and shallow and I should try to discourage it. Even though watching a bunch of strangers try to get a ball to some arbitrary place is objectively just as bizarre as wanting to put coloured goop on your nails, really.

      And then there’s the secondary thing of feeling like a tool of the fashion magazines. Except I’m not, or not entirely, precisely because I don’t rely on cosmetic products for my self-worth. I don’t use them to “fix” things that are “wrong” with me. I know I look fine. I just like adding glitter and colours to all this fine-ness. 😀

      Funny you mention leg hair because I actually fail really hard at leg-shaving. I miss huge areas every time, I forget to shave entirely for a week or two in a row…mind you my leg hair is so fine you can’t really see it so it’s moot.

  5. uncommonmurre

    FWIW, I think your plans to get foot fetishists to buy nail polish for you in exchange for photos would work. Especially if the photos include the polish they just bought as toenail polish.

    • Precisely my plan. “Thank you, so-and-so, for the lovely present! Here’s what it looks like!”

      Long time no see, btw. Hi there. ❤

      • uncommonmurre

        Hi! ❤ Yeah, it has been a while, I've been in a place where reading about sex kind of depressed me and I've kind of been avoiding it, which has moved me out of contact with people as UncommonMurre.

        It sounds like a good plan! Another suggestion from the mind of someone who likes feet, is some kind of hint that you're OK with the use that the purchaser is almost certainly going to use the photo for. I think a lot of guys who are going to be buying a girl presents for the sake of foot photos are going to be on the lonely and insecure side; perhaps their fetish has attracted reactions like this before. Anything you say that indicates you accept their fetish is probably going to be very welcome in a lot of cases. “Hope you enjoy it” or less subtly, “hope you get pleasure from it” kind of thing.

        • Thud

          Uncommonmurre, I discovered your blog, thank you. One of the most interesting ideas that you’ve written is: ” I had an idea for something that seems like it would be fun in a marriage or other relationship where at least one partner likes the other to take control without asking sometimes. Get a piece of jewelry that can go with almost anything, like maybe a pin, and make a verbal agreement that you’ll wear it only when you want your partner to initiate or take control or take you or use you or whatever variation floats your boat. Seems like a nice compromise between the need for communication and the need for silent acquiescence that some people feel. ” Thank you. Its working for me (us).!!!

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