Someone – perhaps The Pedant, or maybe it was just some other cynical, shit-disturbing prick – once told me that Bastardcat only loves me because I feed him.

Well, yeah, I’m not stupid; I know my cat loves me because I provide for him and not, say, for my sense of humour or my plucky underdog vibe or the way I know how to correctly use an apostrophe.

But what you have to ask yourself is: why do people act like cat-love is a trivial thing?

Some nights, Bastardcat curls up under the covers with me and we fall asleep together.  He purrs the entire time – when he finally dozes off the purring stops, but all I have to do is kiss him or say his name and his little cat engine revs right up again.  His face, at these times, is a portrait of pure bliss.  I am the Great Provider – I am the one who keeps him fed and warm and safe and comfortable – and he associates my presence with that warmth, safety and comfort.  And so he curls up against me, enveloped in my body’s heat and scent, and all is right with the world.  Bastardcat’s love is not inferior; it’s not a consolation prize.  It’s actually pretty awesome.

I love The Bunny.  I’m not in love with him; that, to me, is a transcendent meshing of minds that leaves both people feeling enraptured and inspired.  The Bunny is sweet and smart but sometimes (still!  After six months!) we don’t seem to know what to say to each other.  Our conversations don’t take flight.

But he makes me food and gives me orgasms and when I’m so stressed out I can barely function, he caresses me back to life again. On occasion I fall asleep curled up against The Bunny, enveloped in his heat and scent, and on those occasions all is right with the world.

It’s cat-love.  And that’s enough.


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18 responses to “Cat-love

  1. MN

    Bastardcat. It’s a love-hate relationship, isn’t it?

    • How did you know?! :O

      Yeah. I love the little freak but he sneezes on my food, walks on my keyboard, and throws up once every day or two. My nickname for him is “Mommy’s little life-ruiner.”

      The cuddles make up for the other stuff. Mostly.

      • Thud

        ” throws up once every day or two” … if you’re feeding wet food, sprinkle Metamucil on it before you squash it / mix it with a fork. The Metamucil also helps prevent fur balls from forming. Another reason to feed wet instead of kibble…

        • Hmmm. I’ll look into that. Thanks!

          Not sure he needs that, though…he mostly appears to vomit as a form of protest when he’s begging for food and I’m not getting up to feed him. He’ll beg and beg and then eventually puke up a puddle of clear slime.

          And then other times he’ll eat his wet food too fast, or run around like an idiot right after eating, and I would guess he barfs because of that.

          So, probably not gastrointestinal issues, just him being a jerk.

          • Thud

            Cats are never jerks. Dogs and cats vomit clear slime when they are really hungry and they don’t have access to food. Or they will eat grass or houseplants & vomit, again because there was nothing else to eat & they were very hungry. Yes, sometimes they’ll eat & puke, and it could be from eating too much or too fast, but it could also be just a case of not feeling well after eating (this occas hits ME). Or he could be diabetic…..

            • Oh, cats are jerks. Just maybe not in this particular instance.

              I feel pukey when I’m hungry sometimes, although I don’t actually throw up…

              • Thud

                Cats can get nasty if teased or if you get claws removed they can become biters. But they are never jerks. They always have a good reason for what they do. I once had a cat who attacked my erection, fortunately covered by a thick blanket, but he wasn’t being a jerk, he was merely reacting instinctively to a new play toy (I was asleep, and Morning Wood was wobbling about). Puts a new thought in one`s head to the words `pussy`and `penis`in the same sentence.

  2. Thud

    You can trust, er, rely on Bastardcat whereas we men cannot be trusted in the same way. I have 2 cats, both ‘rescued’ : Tiny has been aloof for 90% of his time but suddenly in the last year chooses to sleep on my legs (for warmth?) and will even come very-occasionally to be petted however briefly. The older one who resembles an archery target has become diabetic and chooses to snuggle several hours a day. Unfortunately with no warning he will sneeze on me, mucus and bloodclots. But he’s so affectionate! He’ll purr and massage me, claws out if I tough his forelegs. Both have outlasted 6 lovers.

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