Huh.

So last week I was doing a craft fair and asked Minx if she’d like to come keep me company for a bit.  She told me she was having lunch in the area and would stop by after.  Two or three hours later, she still hadn’t arrived.  I texted her asking what was up and she said she was having tea.  I think I said a couple of other things and she didn’t respond; usually she’s pretty quick to text back.  So then a realization hit me and I was all “are you on a date?!? :D”

Minx finally got her ass to the craft fair (alone) and confirmed that yeah, she had been on a date.  A second date.  She said she didn’t bring the girl with her to the craft fair because it would’ve probably been awkward.  I said she could’ve brought her; I’m fine with that.  Minx just kinda winced in reply.  I guess when she said it would be awkward she didn’t mean on my end.

I asked her a bit about this chick.  During the course of that conversation, it came up that Minx has a date with another girl coming up, too.

I expected to feel more about this; hurt or weird or…something.  Mostly I don’t care.  I am kinda weirded out that she’s apparently fully on the market now – trolling teh interwebz for women.  To the best of my knowledge, Minx has not done sweet fuck all to fix any of the issues that destroyed our relationship; it seems to me she should’ve worked harder at fixing herself before jumping back in the dating pool.  It’s one thing if she was intending on remaining single but met someone in the course of  living her life and wanted to see where it went, but this is not what happened; it sounds like she’s on OKCupid again with deliberate intent to date.  Well, whatever.  If she starts dating some chick and eventually acts like an asshole toward her, it’s the new chick’s problem, not mine.

The other thing about Minx dating is that I enjoy the attention she gives me and wonder whether that will go away if she starts feeling close to someone else.  So far, though, nothing’s changed at all.  On the craft fair day she still flirted with me and touched me the way she usually does, and after the craft fair was done we went grocery shopping together and she came home with me and petted my feet for a bit.

I’ve realized that I am completely repulsed by the thought of Minx’s penis.  When the two of us hang out, it’s almost like we’re dating, and indeed it’s sometimes vaguely tempting to progress things to a making out place…but makeouts lead to nudity and nudity with Minx means seeing and/or dealing with her dick and ARRRRRGH NO.  So it’s quite easy to keep those occasional temptations at bay.

I have no idea whether it’s actually her dick that repulses me (it has caused some trauma for me in the past) or if it just symbolizes a certain level of relationshippy intimacy that my survival instinct is keeping me from repeating.  Either way, I’m glad to have a clear line I won’t cross.  My ambiguous quasi-dating interactions with Minx are fine the way they are.  Things don’t need to go anywhere.

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