Birthday dinner was good. The Pedant ended up texting me to say he was downtown and therefore would be heading to the venue from the opposite direction I would, so he’d see me there (instead of heading over with me). He ended up arriving maybe ten minutes late; no big deal.
Everyone present got along reasonably well, although there were one or two nerve-wracking awkward silences. Although I’d told everyone I didn’t need gifts, Red bought me a pretty blank journal, purple sparkly nail polish, and a Swiss Chalet gift card (Swiss Chalet being where we had dinner). But then The Social worker ended up paying my bill for me so now I have a free meal to use some other time. W00T!
I don’t know what it was about Birthday Dinner Day but for some reason a bunch of Pedant perspective slapped me upside the head all at once. Like on our way home together from dinner he was (as usual) riffing about the politics of some sci-fi show I don’t watch or the difference between agriculture-based and hunter/gatherer societies or some other thing I don’t really care about and can’t really follow, and I was thinking “Wait…why have I been having such mushy feelings for him, again?”
It’s possible I’ll swing back in the other direction at some point (out of loneliness or new information coming to light or whatever), but for now it is terribly clear to me that this boy and I have nothing in common but good sexual chemistry and a friendly acceptance of each other’s weird brain quirks. Plus the thing where he’s endearingly helpful around the house doesn’t hurt.
He ended up asking to stay over a second night (which means he was here on my actual birthday, which was nice just on principle) although both of us were too worn out to have any more sex today.
So…the feelings of love I had for him have gone away (as I suspected they might; that’s why I never used that word with him, settling on “fond” instead) but it’s still kind of rough going from tons of sex and snuggles to…none of either. I’m feeling pretty bad withdrawal pains right now* and hope my FetLife ad bears fruit so I can diversify a bit – get my attention and validation from more than one source.
I’ll probably write more of a play-by-play later**. Right now, it’s still my birthday for another six hours or so and I want to spend it away from the computer. 🙂
* Even though while he was here I sometimes found his presence overwhelming and wanted to be alone! I can’t win…
**If anyone even cares. Honestly, the painstakingly detailed posts about the sex I’m having are mostly for me – so I can come back, reread, and relive it all. But if you guys like my overshares, that’s a nice bonus. 🙂