…But I’d rather HE wore the lingerie…

The 23 28 year old responded to my message already.  Favourably.

Like me, he prefers small quiet gatherings to huge loud crowded group outings, and prefers email/texting to talking on the phone.  So hooray for that!

And!  He says if we hit it off he might get my help with taking pictures of him – some of them naked or partially naked.  Which is hilarious because I was gonna ask him if I could take naked pics of him.  Oh, and also he’s interested in exploring crossdressing.  I could totally help with that. 😀

Overall he seems like he has potential.  I’m not developing a huge crush or anything but I find him articulate and a reasonably good conversationalist and we seem to be on the same page with what we’re looking for – a nice, casual FWB thing that will probably involve me photographing him and/or feminizing and/or dominating him.

One hitch, though, is that he told me outright that he’s into “feminine” women – which immediately makes me bristle.  I do not know what “feminine” means to him, but historically when guys have said this to me it means all the gender performance bullshit of long hair/makeup/pantyhose/heels.  I believe I’ve already mentioned the dude from a bunch of years ago who called me “unfeminine” because I usually wear (fitted, girly) jeans and t-shirts and my hair is short.  Never mind that I have a 29″ waist and 45″ hips; apparently being a woman is all about the clothes, and I’m not doing it right.  

It’s possible I’m still a bit bitter about that whole thing.  


The good news is, this dude does find my FetLife profile pic attractive, and I’m wearing jeans and a hoodie in it.  And I was honest with him that I don’t have long hair or wear makeup or dresses all that much but that my actual body structure is pretty feminine so he can take from that whatever he wants.  I sent him a good clear face pic, too, just to make damn sure he knows what he’s dealing with (and that is how I think of it…like my semi-tomboyish look is something he’ll have to “deal with.”  I wonder if super-girly heels-and-makeup chicks ever find themselves apologizing to guys for how they present themselves?  I tend to assume they don’t).

Despite occasionally feeling that I have to defend my fashion choices, I have to say, I don’t often feel like my hideous, manly presentation gets in the way of my dating life overall.  I mean, even with my head mostly shaved I’ve still gotten attention from, and had brief dalliances with, plenty of plain ol’ jeans-and-t-shirts-wearing dudes you wouldn’t think would be attracted to a punk-looking chick.  Maybe this cute FetLife boy will see something appealing in me even without high heels, as so many others have.  

Or, maybe I’ll turn out not to be his type.  And that’s fine too.

But you guys…his ass is spectacular.  I want access to it.  Let’s all keep our fingers crossed.


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7 responses to “…But I’d rather HE wore the lingerie…

  1. Just A Slut

    Just for the record, I wear girly clothes and I get gruff for people who don’t like me going fishing because I might “break a nail”. I don’t miss a beauty appointment and always have my hair done but when I show up at a hunting lodge or a shooting gallery some jack ass always asks where my husband is.

    So many times I almost told them my husband isn’t the one I was waiting for. He’s at home and I might have been waiting for my girlfriend. I was tempted.

    I can’t show up to a hockey game or football without some man trying to explain the game to me.

    Trust me, men give women shit no matter what. Either we are too girly to be taken seriously or not girly enough in which we are lesbiens or simply not women at all.

    Hypocrisy at its finest!

    I am really happy for you finding a new intrest though and wanted to say congratulations though. And I don’t apologize for liking my hair done either by the way. Lmao I just smile and show the idiots that I may be a girl but I am a great shot and I know enough about football and hockey that I don’t need a tour guide.

    -Just A Slut

    • Oh, that’s right, men love the look of girly-girls but don’t take them seriously. I forgot. Thank you for sharing your experiences – I’m at the other end of the scale from you (I look sorta butch but don’t particularly enjoy any “manly” pursuits unless you count fucking dudes’ asses) so the whole “showing up to a hunting lodge looking pretty” thing is not a situation I would have any idea about. 🙂

      Speaking of not taking women seriously…I’m looking through FetLife dude’s journal posts and there’s one where he said he feels inherently interior to women, and another where he says a businesswoman gave a talk at his school but when her “business” turned out to be related to purses and accessories he kinda rolled his eyes and discounted her business acumen. So…women are superior, and also he prefers very feminine women, and yet feminine things are stupid? I may just have to leave a WTF in his comments.

  2. Just A Slut

    There is a you tube video of the first woman to try out for the NFL. (Not that I have a problem with that) But this dumb girl kicked the football like 20 yards. Lmfao! Rather then bringing women forward with the times she showed up kicking like a girl. Just from morbid curiosity ask him what he thinks about this “superior broad” lmao I wonder if he will give lots of props for showing up or be disgusted she didn’t represent the race better thus proving that this chick should look ashamed and be inferior herself lmfao.

    But that might be the trouble maker in me asking.

    -Just A Slut

  3. Pictures or it didn’t happen.

  4. gingernic

    I wonder if super-girly heels-and-makeup chicks ever find themselves apologizing to guys for how they present themselves? I tend to assume they don’t
    I’m comfortable with any look from very butch to extreme femme, with a usual day-to-day average in the middle with a fitted women’s tee-shirt and men’s jeans (they have real pockets!). And yeah, I tend to get uncomfortably frustrated and feel the need to explain myself because of the assumptions people make about me as a person based on dress/gender in all of them. It’s worse in skirts and heels, actually, because a lot of things I do are not generally considered “feminine,” and people don’t understand that putting on a sundress does not automatically remove my ability to lift heavy objects, fix my car, or cuss like a sailor.

    Apologize, though? Heck, no. Apologizing for dress when not actually doing anything wrong would validate the idea that tomboyishness or too-tallness in heels or whatever is a problem. I’d hate to do that. (I have apologized for accidentally overdressing when level of formality is not specified. I don’t like making a date feel shabby or underdressed.)

    But yay for boys who like to be photographed, even if they seem rather confused about women?

    • Apologize, though? Heck, no. Apologizing for dress when not actually doing anything wrong would validate the idea that tomboyishness or too-tallness in heels or whatever is a problem.

      Agreed. I was actually very, very careful not to seem apologetic to this guy, for that reason. But I still felt defensive and apologetic on the inside, and I hate it.

      And he continues to say stupid shit that puts me on the defensive, btw (see my next post). Grrrrr.

      My most recent pair of jeans is from the men’s section btw and yes! The pockets are so much deeper. I’d put my cell phone in one of the front pockets and panic fifty times a day because I’d pat my hip not feel the phone there…because it had slid down to my thigh.

  5. Pingback: Very Inspiring Blogger Award! | Confessions of a Preacher's Daughter

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