I’m trying to give The Pedant room to initiate our next get-together, but it’s hard ’cause I like him and I want to know when I’ll be seeing him again.  Le sigh…

If too many more days go by without him offering a meet-up, I’ll just go ahead and initiate my damn self, again…and also ask him how often he wants to hang out, in general.  Like, establish what the pace is.  Maybe The Pedant’s interest in hangouts is more sporadic than mine*.  Maybe his interest in hangouts is the same as mine but he thinks I’m into it less than he is and is trying not to smother me.  

Aw, fuck it, I’m just gonna ask him his pace now.  We’ll have that negotiation and maybe once he knows what page I’m on, he’ll be more forthcoming with making plans.

The awesome thing about The Pedant probably being autistic is that I don’t have to worry about my exact wording the way I would with most guys.  I’m beginning to realize that he takes me at face value and doesn’t read all kinds of weird secret motives into anything.

Okay, off I go to text him.


* But he would’ve stayed over for two consecutive nights last time if I hadn’t stopped him, so he doesn’t seem too aloof…


Filed under Uncategorized

2 responses to “Frequency

  1. So, again, I have no way of knowing if this is true of the Pedant, but I wanted to note that for some people, initiating plans is an anxiety thing, but accepting plans isn’t. I’m like that – for whatever reason, my brain always tells me that trying to tell someone I want to spend time with them, spend more time with them, etc, is imposing on them, even when we’ve had great times in the past.

    • I have that same anxiety thing, which is why I want him to start pulling his weight with the planning of get-togethers!

      I’ve told him I want him to initiate more, and he’s said that he will, but to me that would mean asking me what this week’s itinerary looks like now so we can start figuring out when both of us are free. He has not done this. Therefore, either he’s falling down on the job (possibly due to anxiety, as you mentioned) or he’s fully planning on initiating our next thing but not until a week or two from now. Hence my texting him to ask his preferred frequency.

      Waiting for a reply now. 😛

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s