The Pedant’s response to my “Let’s just forget about Sunday” text:
Crap. I didn’t see these texts until now. Sunday I’m free the whole day. If you’re free at all that day, let me know. :S
Am I shrooming or does this sound like he’s planning on keeping that day open just in case I decide to get in touch with him? Or like he might be mooning around the house all day wishing he’d hear from me?
This message is totally unprecedented; The Pedant always, always gives me the impression that he’s constantly inundated with requests for his time and if I take too long to invite him someplace I’ll lose my chance. I’ll ask to see him on some particular day and he’ll be like “I think that should work but let me get back to you” or “I’m pretty sure I’ve got nothing going on that day.” This is literally the first time he’s ever flat-out said “I am free on [day].”
So I’m thinking my cancellation text had the desired effect.
It’s entirely too tempting to take him up on his offer. I do kinda miss him (and I could really use a massage right now…) and in theory, inviting him over on Sunday after all would be a positive reinforcement thing – rewarding him for sucking up to me and making himself available. Except I’m pretty sure that’s not actually how it works. If I relent and invite him over for Sunday after all, he’ll get the impression that I just need to have a little fit of pique and then everything blows over and is normal again.
The thing to do here is probably to basically ignore him until our scheduled get-together on Friday. Let him miss me a bit. Let him stew.
Funny how counterintuitive it feels to back off in order to make him want me more. I know damn well it works on me (as evidenced by how needy I suddenly feel when The Pedant acts like he’s to busy to fit me into his schedule)…so why is my first instinct to coddle him so he won’t get disappointed and give up on me? Grrrr.