Last night, after The Doll had left, I made a post on Fetlife basically explaining that D/s requires trust from both parties – a sub has to trust me not to physically or emotionally harm him or abuse my authority, and I have to trust him to actually do what I ask so I’m not left hanging out to dry. It’s a scary thing, taking the reins with someone new; I’m making myself pretty vulnerable. I need to feel like I’m in a safe space to do that and my sub won’t pull the metaphorical football away just as I’m trying to kick it.
I capped off the post by mentioning that I’m seeing someone new and at the moment I’m kind of hanging back a bit to assess whether I can trust him to follow my lead…but that he seems to be demonstrating pretty hard that he’s ready to follow, so I think I may be safe to take the plunge.
The Doll seems to seek out and consume any information I make available about myself, so it’s a good bet he’ll see this post. Which is exactly what I want.
If The Doll doesn’t seem to have read my post by the next time I see him, I’ll have to just bite the bullet and tell him outright “I would like to be more dominant with you. I feel like you’ve been giving off signals that this would be welcomed, but I want to hear you actually say it before I proceed.”
But it would be pretty hot if he – for instance – read that FetLife journal entry and commented (pretending to be an impartial observer) that this boy I’m seeing totally does sound like he’s ready to be controlled and I should probably just go for it.
So now…we wait. 😀